THE ULTIMATUM

In order for you to understand this blog post, I need to give you a bit of a background on the people involved.

Nicole is a young girl in her mid 20’s, single and attractive.
David is also young, about the same age.

Nicole and David met through a friend and they immediately hit it off, started talking every day, chatting on facebook chat, flirting etc. It took a while for David to ask Nicole for her number, because, apparently, he’s a shy guy. So when he finally did, she was all smiles. After this, they started talking on the phone, and chatting on facebook chat, and inboxing each other all day (don’t ask me what on earth they were talking about). Before long, they started meeting up, hanging out...and obviously, they slept together. Now all this while, they had not committed to each other, although David would once in a while drop a hint that he wants to be with her and nobody else.

At some point, David found a better job in another town and he had to relocate. But he promised to come back and visit Nicole every weekend. I remember Nicole actually wanted to get a job in the town that David moved to just so she could be close to him. All was going so well with them.

One Friday, David just randomly showed up at Nicole’s office, he says he wanted to surprise her. She was obviously very happy and they agreed to meet up later and so on. I’m not sure if they met up that weekend or not but it’s not important.

Come Monday morning, Nicole is in her office chatting to her friends when she hears something rather interesting. It appears David has a long-term girlfriend, let’s call her...Karla. Nicole’s friend fills her in on the details that David and Karla have been together for years, on and off. Karla has a heart problem and people think she uses that to keep David by her side.

Obviously this news disturbs Nicole. She tries to get hold of David, but he does not answer her calls. She sends him a facebook message asking him about Karla and he doesn’t reply. After about 2 weeks, David shows up. He calls Nicole and starts apologising, saying he really does care about her but it’s a difficult situation etc. Nicole gives him a piece of her mind and they end up arguing.

For a while, Nicole and David are not on speaking terms. Then slowly but surely, David starts worming his way back into Nicole’s life. She softens and starts chatting with him again, just as friends. But soon enough, David starts flirting with Nicole again; you know...the sweet texts, the early morning phone calls just to say hey, the late night texts and so on. Nicole accepts him back, not sure what he wants, but willing to find out because she still likes him.

One weekend, David is back in Nicole’s town and they run into each other at a bar. They start talking and obviously, end up making out in the back of her car. They agree to go their separate ways and meet up again later in the night and David’s place, which they do. This time, Nicole goes to David’s house and because his friends are home, he gets into her car and they drive off somewhere. Things get heated up again, but this time, to get the upper hand, Nicole decides to leave David hanging...with blue balls so to speak. He protests and all but at the end of the night, she feels like a winner.

Next day, David starts texting Nicole again, like he’s forgiven and forgotten the blue balls he slept with the night before.

Now... the dilemma Nicole is in: David is still dating Karla and shows no signs of leaving. He simple says, it’s a complicated situation. Nicole says he’s a genuinely good guy and she thinks he really cares about her. My advice to Nicole was to just tell him that until he sorts out his issues and is 100% singe, they should just be friends. She’s thinking about giving David an ultimatum: Her or Me...Because she thinks there is a chance he might actually leave Karla for her.

What should Nicole do?