So, the other day I was having a discussion with some friends and she asked me "Do you think it's possible to learn to love someone?"
Now, I have always been a firm believer in the notion that Love is meant to happen naturally. You either Love someone or you don't. It just happens. But here is the big dilemma that alot of people face at some point. There are times when you really like someone and you want to be with them, but then they are not that into you. At the same time, there is someone else that likes you and really wants to be with you but you are not into them. Question is: Are you supposed to just date the person that's into you even though you're not feeling them, and just somehow learn to love them?
As a woman, when you are approaching a certain age, the pressure to settle down becomes intense. With your parents trying to hook you up with random guys. "hey, this is so and so's son, why don't you guys go out for lunch"..lol. and all your friends getting married, it can become frustrating. so, if you are at that age and you find yourself in the situation I just described above. What do you do? You're not getting younger. You can literally hear your biological clock ticking..lol.. Most people would just settle for the guy that's into them even though they are not feeling him.
From my research, most of the people I spoke to said, they might as well just go for it and somehow hope the person grows on them with time: fear of being alone. Others said, its better to be alone that to be with someone you dont really like. Because at the end of the day, even if you grow fond of him, it won't be love, it will be fondness and your heart will still be looking for love elsewhere. hmmm...any thoughts on this?
Now, I have always been a firm believer in the notion that Love is meant to happen naturally. You either Love someone or you don't. It just happens. But here is the big dilemma that alot of people face at some point. There are times when you really like someone and you want to be with them, but then they are not that into you. At the same time, there is someone else that likes you and really wants to be with you but you are not into them. Question is: Are you supposed to just date the person that's into you even though you're not feeling them, and just somehow learn to love them?
As a woman, when you are approaching a certain age, the pressure to settle down becomes intense. With your parents trying to hook you up with random guys. "hey, this is so and so's son, why don't you guys go out for lunch"..lol. and all your friends getting married, it can become frustrating. so, if you are at that age and you find yourself in the situation I just described above. What do you do? You're not getting younger. You can literally hear your biological clock ticking..lol.. Most people would just settle for the guy that's into them even though they are not feeling him.
From my research, most of the people I spoke to said, they might as well just go for it and somehow hope the person grows on them with time: fear of being alone. Others said, its better to be alone that to be with someone you dont really like. Because at the end of the day, even if you grow fond of him, it won't be love, it will be fondness and your heart will still be looking for love elsewhere. hmmm...any thoughts on this?
You have raised very intersting issues there. Should parents be involved in deciding who their future son/daughter in law should be? Should the biological clock determine when one should get hitched? Marriage is not for everyone. But the love zone should be approached in the same way we approach other areas of our lives. Both parties I think must be on the same page. Feelings change.Sometimes the one you like today may not be the one for you tommorrow.
ReplyDeleteMMMH!! i don't think love can be grown between two people. Love has to start by liking each other, then it grows. Everyone get scared of being alone and as a result you may end up getting married to someone whom you don't like, however, are you going to be happy. Happiness plays a major role in everything, and the rest follows, so if you are not happy then you will be miserable for the rest of your life...
ReplyDeleteTrue. You might think the love will come and the feelings will change but they hardly ever change. Like I said, you either like someone or you don't. If you dont, I think its better to be alone. However, alot of people dont go by this, they cant face the idea of being alone on valentines day...:0
ReplyDeleteI loved the post ; and I totally agree with your views on this ..Its one's personal choice ; but the fact is one cannot avoid "Parental pressure" ..
ReplyDeleteIf there's no way out of it , then , the question of accepting whatever comes your way should be "TAKEN".. But I guess personal freedom should not be curbed..
And happiness at the end is what matters..
And if you want happiness, you should live for yourself .. and with the one you consider " YOUR TRUE LOVE "